It's been said that true life is stranger than fiction . . . and there are day's that true life is funnier than anything your imagination could make up. Last night was one of those nights.
Becky stayed at church for choir and Aidan stayed with her to hang with friends. As I was driving home from church with Noah, Titus, Tucker, Cade, and Nurse Lisa, Tucker announces from the back seat, "I gotta go to the bathroom".
Dad: "Tucker, you will have to wait till we get home."
Tucker: "But Dad, I gotta go Big Poo!"
Dad: "You can hold it."
Noah: "Maybe you can stop along the side of the road and he can go just like the dogs".
Dad glaring through the rearview mirrow: "Noah, that's not helping".
Tucker: "Dad, I REALLY GOTTA GO!"
Dad: "Son, you can make it."
Well, Tucker wasn't the only one who needed a restroom. All through Bible Study, I had been sipping on a Big Gulp of Diet Coke, and my bladder finally indicated it was about as full as it was going to get. But I am an adult - I can hold it without announcing it to everyone in the car.
We pull in the garage and it takes 5 minutes for everyone to get out of the car. Why it takes Tucker and Cade 5 minutes to get out of the Suburban when both of them had stated they needed a restroom, I do not know. I do know that Cade had to get out of the backseat first before Tucker could get out, and I do believe he was using this little bit of control as a show of power over his older brother.
I unbuckle Titus and take him to his room while Lisa begins his nighttime routine of therapy and meds.
I take the puppy outside since he's barking incessantly and he also needs to go. I come back in the house to go the bathroom and the hall bathroom door is shut. Cade announces he is in there. I go to my bedroom and to use my own bathroom, but Tucker announces he is in there. Noah (the ever helpful 2nd born) announces that I should go upstairs. My legs were shaky enough at this point that I informed him I was not walking upstairs and should have priority over my own bathroom.
And then I hear this from Tucker behind the bathroom door, "Dad, I pooped on the floor".
"You did WHAT?"
"I couldn't hold it and it slipped out and I pooped on the floor".
At this point, I'm not sure what came over to me, but in disbelief I told him to open the door and show me.
And, yes, sure enough, there it was.
And this is when my mind went into a deja vu fog of what my life use to be.
There was time I lived in a spotless, immaculate house with a perfect weed-free lawn. Now, I step over legos and dog toys scattered all over the house and stare in disbelief at the weeds that have taken over my back yard.
There was a time when I drove a luxury sports coupe and enjoyed the envied stares I would get as I drove by. Now, I drive a mini-van with stow-n-go seats (and no one stares in envy except the occasional soccer mom).
There was a time my evenings were quiet, I could sit in a comfortable chair, and I ruled the remote control. Now, I sit in the back of the living room while my two oldest lounge on the sofas with a grip on the remote control.
There was a time I went to the movies and enjoyed the entire experience of surround sound and large screen action. Now, I go to the movies once a year with 4 boys to see an animated feature but I miss portions of it shuttling little ones to the bathroom.
There was a time I bought clothes that were NOT on sale - if I saw it and I liked it, I bought it. Now, I shop twice a year, at Dillards end-of-season 75% off sale (and if I'm lucky I hit the additional 30% off weekend).
All of these thoughts flooded my mind as I stared at floor. Tucker finished his business, and ran off to bed, and I knelt on the floor to clean up the mess (and mop the floor, and scrub my hands). An hour ago, I had been emailing a senior Vice President on salary and bonus bands for job categories, and now, I'm on my knees scrubbing the floor - such is life.
I Thessalonians 4:11 states to "Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business and to work with your hands"
There was a time when life was all about me, all about what I wanted, all about my pursuit of happiness. And that was part of the problem - it was all about me. It took years for me to realize that life was not about me, not about seeking attention for myself, not about getting what I wanted.
There is a joy in serving others. As a husband, I will do anything for my wife - go to any lengths. As a dad, I love my boys like nothing else in this world and will protect them, serve them, (and yes, clean up after them). And as a Christ-follower, I long to see the world through his eyes so that I may serve Him and serve others.
So I smile, I laugh, and I enjoy the life and surroundings that God lets me experience.
Showing posts with label Tucker. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tucker. Show all posts
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Tucker's Homecoming Day
Five years ago today, we brought Tucker home from Seoul, Korea. The memories of that day still resonant in my mind.
When we flew to Korea, we met Tucker the first full day we were there. We sat nervously in the reception room waiting for our appointment to meet with him and his foster mom. When they walked in, his foster mom did not notice us sitting there, but we immediately knew that the baby she was holding was our son. We had looked at his pictures for 6 1/2 months and had watched the videos that had been sent to us, so we recognized him immediately. During that first meeting, we just wanted to hold him and smother him with kisses. He, of course, wanted his foster mom since he had now clue who these two crazy white people were.
Several days later, a taxi took us to his foster parents home and we got to see the place where he lived his first 8 months of life. We met his foster dad, we gave gifts, we communicated through an interpreter as best we could, but our eyes were fixated on this little bundle of energy. The visit with his foster parents told us one thing - this little boy was deeply loved. This couple had been foster parents for 20+ years, but they had never had one child as long as they had had Tucker. They were deeply attached to him. The adoption agency had informed us that we would take possession of Tucker that night since we were leaving early the next morning for Dallas.
And my heart started to break. This precious woman who had given countless hours to care for this little boy was selflessly handing him over. And I kept thinking of his birth mom, who had done the same thing in this same building 8 months before - handing over her son selflessly.
Our social worker stepped up, put her arms between us and the foster mom, and gently said "It's time for you to go". We repeated "thank you, thank you, thank you" through our tears as we stepped to the elevator that would take us to our room. The foster mom followed us, holding her hand out to Tucker and sobbing, The social worker stood behind her, holding her.
And the elevator doors closed.
It was the slowest elevator ride up those 5 flights. We walked off the elevator and to our room. It was the first time we had been alone with Tucker. He looked at us, and the bottom lip began to quiver. And then he began to cry, then sob, and then wail. Our agency had told us that children, even babies would grieve their loss and that this could happen, but Becky and I thought "surely not our child".
Tucker finally quieted down and went to sleep. We pushed our two twin beds together and had Tucker sleep between us. The next morning, he was quiet. It took a lot of coaxing to get a smile or laugh. Once we got on the plane, he preferred the flight attendants over us, but we made it home with just a few breakdowns (and one major throw-up on take-off).
When we flew to Korea, we met Tucker the first full day we were there. We sat nervously in the reception room waiting for our appointment to meet with him and his foster mom. When they walked in, his foster mom did not notice us sitting there, but we immediately knew that the baby she was holding was our son. We had looked at his pictures for 6 1/2 months and had watched the videos that had been sent to us, so we recognized him immediately. During that first meeting, we just wanted to hold him and smother him with kisses. He, of course, wanted his foster mom since he had now clue who these two crazy white people were.
Several days later, a taxi took us to his foster parents home and we got to see the place where he lived his first 8 months of life. We met his foster dad, we gave gifts, we communicated through an interpreter as best we could, but our eyes were fixated on this little bundle of energy. The visit with his foster parents told us one thing - this little boy was deeply loved. This couple had been foster parents for 20+ years, but they had never had one child as long as they had had Tucker. They were deeply attached to him. The adoption agency had informed us that we would take possession of Tucker that night since we were leaving early the next morning for Dallas.
A few hours later, it was raining sofly outside. Another family was also recieving their son that night. We were all waiting in the lobby at the adoption agency with the social worker and the director. The other little boy had arrived - Hank. He was 18 months old and was a non-stop talker and walker. It seemed like we waited for hours, but in reality it was probably 15 minutes before Tucker and his foster mom arrived. She was quite flustered that she was late and was very apologetic.
She held Tucker so tightly as she started to cry. She placed him in our arms as the director prayed a blessing. She stood there and started to sob and Becky put her arms around her. And the three of us stood there holding each other as I held Tucker. She continued to kiss him and touch him.
And my heart started to break. This precious woman who had given countless hours to care for this little boy was selflessly handing him over. And I kept thinking of his birth mom, who had done the same thing in this same building 8 months before - handing over her son selflessly.
Our social worker stepped up, put her arms between us and the foster mom, and gently said "It's time for you to go". We repeated "thank you, thank you, thank you" through our tears as we stepped to the elevator that would take us to our room. The foster mom followed us, holding her hand out to Tucker and sobbing, The social worker stood behind her, holding her.
And the elevator doors closed.
It was the slowest elevator ride up those 5 flights. We walked off the elevator and to our room. It was the first time we had been alone with Tucker. He looked at us, and the bottom lip began to quiver. And then he began to cry, then sob, and then wail. Our agency had told us that children, even babies would grieve their loss and that this could happen, but Becky and I thought "surely not our child".
Tucker cried for 2 hours - non-stop. We went down to the family room on the 4th floor to visit with the other families staying at the adoption agency who were waiting to receive their children. Hank, the other boy who received his new family that night, was running around in circles, playing, laughing, and have a great time. His new mom was trailing behind him. The other families looked at Hank and smiled. Then they looked at us and would stop smiling. They kept repeating "it will be ok" over and over. Looking back now, I think they were talking to themselves instead of us. We could see the apprehension that was building up in their eyes thinking "what will my child do when he's placed in our arms?"
Once we arrived at DFW, we knew the quiet moments of just the 3 of us would end as Tucker would be meeting his brothers and extended family. As we walked through the hallway to the doors leading us outside of customs, we heard shouts of "here they come!" What a sight it was to walk out and see 50+ friends and family welcoming us home. Aidan and Noah ran up to meet their baby brother. We were a family of 5 now.
The last 5 years have flown as my little bundle of energy has become a Daily boy. Each child in our family brings a different flavor and facet. Tucker is our sanguine son. He never meets a stranger, knows everyone's name, plays with anybody, loves all animals (especially worms right now). He's all boy through and through. He's our little fearless jock and still our cuddlebunny. He has a great sense of humor and loves to tell knock-knock jokes.
And most of all, he's our son.
Monday, March 29, 2010
Busy Weekend
We had one of the busiest weekends. Normally, weekends around our house are pretty relaxed, but the last 72 hours were non-stop.
Friday night, Tucker had his first baseball game. He was SOOOOOO excited to get out there and play. He did a great job of listening to the coach. His team only had one practice due to rain and spring break, so they still have some basics to work on (for example, drop the bat and run to first base when you hit the ball - don't just stand there.) But the key thing was, he had fun! And he had huge cheering section there with his entire family, grandparents, uncle, and puppy in the stands.
Saturday, I had a deacon kick-off breakfast for our deacon mentoring process. I am excited about mentoring Brian R - one of the guys I've known for the last couple of years - and I will say our church has a great process for bringing on new deacons and training them on "through the dust" service.
Becky left Saturday morning with the boys and Ashley K. to take her 1/2 way back to Houston. She met Ashley's parent's in Buffalo, TX and then visited for awhile at the best bar-b-que spot in Tx. Titus stayed home with Nana until I could get home from breakfast.
After breakfast, I swung by the car wash to clean up Becky's suburban. We have the best carwash in McKinney that's cheap and provides a self-service vacuum spot. As I am vacumming the car out, the 30 mph winds we were experiencing Saturday slammed the door shut (along with the car keys and my phone inside), and then I heard click and all of the sudden I am locked out of the car at the carwash. There's nothing like standing next to your car at the carwash for 45 minutes explaining to everyone who drives up to use the vacuums that you locked yourself out of the car to teach you humility.
When I got home, I put Titus down for his afternoon nap. When he awoke, I took Titus to the mall to finish up some shopping for Becky's birthday. It was a fun little trip - just the two of us. I have always taken the boys out shopping at Christmas and birthdays, but this was the first time it was just me and Titus. He was quite talkative in the car and smiled at all the ladies in the mall.
Sunday was a whirlwind. I taught Sunday School, but we were a little late as we took time at breakfast for Becky to open her gifts. Then we went to Snuffers for cheese fries and hamburgers (basically, a heart-attack on a plate of artery cloggin cheese and grease - but hey, it was Beck's birthday). After lunch, we took Noah to FBC Allen for the Collin County Associational Bible Drill. He got a PERFECT score. I was so proud of him - he has diligently applied himself and studied all year. He has now qualified for the Texas State Bible Drill in a few weeks.
On the way back to the house, we had to stop and celebrate at Braums with some ice cream. We sat and laughed with friends from church while wolfing down more ice cream/fat that probably did more artery cloggin than necessary for one day (but now we had two things to celebrate).
Back at the house, we did a quick clean up in preparation for Moral Innocence class while watching the Baylor vs Duke game. Baylor did great -wished they would have won. I don't think I have seen so many Baptists on their knees in a long time.
We have 8 couples joining us for the next 8 weeks for Reflections of Moral Innocence. What a great class and great couples! We have taught all of these couples at some time over the last few years, so it's always a blessing to have them back in our home and see how they are progressing with their parenting skills.
So in a way, after such a whirlwind, it's kind of nice to be at the office sitting still today. I'm headed off to Denver for a few days this week and then I'm looking forward to the celebration of Easter this weekend.
Titus seems to be doing better, but we will have him checked out with the pediatrician this week to assure his ear infection is clearing up and the fluid behind his ear has gone away.
Friday night, Tucker had his first baseball game. He was SOOOOOO excited to get out there and play. He did a great job of listening to the coach. His team only had one practice due to rain and spring break, so they still have some basics to work on (for example, drop the bat and run to first base when you hit the ball - don't just stand there.) But the key thing was, he had fun! And he had huge cheering section there with his entire family, grandparents, uncle, and puppy in the stands.
Saturday, I had a deacon kick-off breakfast for our deacon mentoring process. I am excited about mentoring Brian R - one of the guys I've known for the last couple of years - and I will say our church has a great process for bringing on new deacons and training them on "through the dust" service.
Becky left Saturday morning with the boys and Ashley K. to take her 1/2 way back to Houston. She met Ashley's parent's in Buffalo, TX and then visited for awhile at the best bar-b-que spot in Tx. Titus stayed home with Nana until I could get home from breakfast.
After breakfast, I swung by the car wash to clean up Becky's suburban. We have the best carwash in McKinney that's cheap and provides a self-service vacuum spot. As I am vacumming the car out, the 30 mph winds we were experiencing Saturday slammed the door shut (along with the car keys and my phone inside), and then I heard click and all of the sudden I am locked out of the car at the carwash. There's nothing like standing next to your car at the carwash for 45 minutes explaining to everyone who drives up to use the vacuums that you locked yourself out of the car to teach you humility.
When I got home, I put Titus down for his afternoon nap. When he awoke, I took Titus to the mall to finish up some shopping for Becky's birthday. It was a fun little trip - just the two of us. I have always taken the boys out shopping at Christmas and birthdays, but this was the first time it was just me and Titus. He was quite talkative in the car and smiled at all the ladies in the mall.
Sunday was a whirlwind. I taught Sunday School, but we were a little late as we took time at breakfast for Becky to open her gifts. Then we went to Snuffers for cheese fries and hamburgers (basically, a heart-attack on a plate of artery cloggin cheese and grease - but hey, it was Beck's birthday). After lunch, we took Noah to FBC Allen for the Collin County Associational Bible Drill. He got a PERFECT score. I was so proud of him - he has diligently applied himself and studied all year. He has now qualified for the Texas State Bible Drill in a few weeks.
On the way back to the house, we had to stop and celebrate at Braums with some ice cream. We sat and laughed with friends from church while wolfing down more ice cream/fat that probably did more artery cloggin than necessary for one day (but now we had two things to celebrate).
Back at the house, we did a quick clean up in preparation for Moral Innocence class while watching the Baylor vs Duke game. Baylor did great -wished they would have won. I don't think I have seen so many Baptists on their knees in a long time.
We have 8 couples joining us for the next 8 weeks for Reflections of Moral Innocence. What a great class and great couples! We have taught all of these couples at some time over the last few years, so it's always a blessing to have them back in our home and see how they are progressing with their parenting skills.
So in a way, after such a whirlwind, it's kind of nice to be at the office sitting still today. I'm headed off to Denver for a few days this week and then I'm looking forward to the celebration of Easter this weekend.
Titus seems to be doing better, but we will have him checked out with the pediatrician this week to assure his ear infection is clearing up and the fluid behind his ear has gone away.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Spring Break
Becky took Noah, Tucker, and Cade to Houston with her to visit friends for a few days. And so today, they had to do what all spring-breakers do in Texas - GO TO THE BEACH! Of course, it's still a bit chilly, but they are having a great time.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Wheels are Off!
So many things happened last week that I am just now getting caught up. But one of the most exciting was for Tucker and Cade.
Last Monday, Becky's sister, Angela, was in town. She decided today was the day for Tucker to learn to ride his bike. (Now, you need to have a little back story - last time she was in town, she decided Cade needed to learn how to swallow a pill - and he ended up throwing up all over her when she stuck in his mouth). But Angela wouldn't let something like that deter her from her end result. She took off Tucker's training wheels, put him on his bike, and sent him down the street. Tucker was yelling "don't let go, don't let go" all the way down the street - and she had stopped way back. He took off like a shot and hasn't looked back since. We are now working on him stopping (instead of just falling off his bike like's he has been doing.
The next day, Cade announces he is going to ride his bike. Now, after puking all over Angela when she tried to teach him how to swallow a pill, I was very leery on how this one was going to go. And, since Cade is deaf in one ear due to his middle ear not formed correctly - it leads to some of his coordination and balance issues.
But, Cade, surprising us all, took off and didn't look back. (Of course, we are also teaching him now how to stop and not just fall off - but that's what helmets are for!)
Becky and the boys (minus Titus) took off for Houston today to visit friends. They will pick up Aidan Thursday afternoon at the Houston airport when he arrives for Belize.
Titus and I are hanging out at the house. Lisa is with him during the day, and I'll take care of him during the night. His cough has improved a lot since last week, but he is still having some heavy secretions. We have a new medication that we started yesterday and will see how that helps.
Please continue to pray for Aidan in Belize. We've been getting reports and seen some pictures and it looks like he is having a great time.
Last Monday, Becky's sister, Angela, was in town. She decided today was the day for Tucker to learn to ride his bike. (Now, you need to have a little back story - last time she was in town, she decided Cade needed to learn how to swallow a pill - and he ended up throwing up all over her when she stuck in his mouth). But Angela wouldn't let something like that deter her from her end result. She took off Tucker's training wheels, put him on his bike, and sent him down the street. Tucker was yelling "don't let go, don't let go" all the way down the street - and she had stopped way back. He took off like a shot and hasn't looked back since. We are now working on him stopping (instead of just falling off his bike like's he has been doing.
The next day, Cade announces he is going to ride his bike. Now, after puking all over Angela when she tried to teach him how to swallow a pill, I was very leery on how this one was going to go. And, since Cade is deaf in one ear due to his middle ear not formed correctly - it leads to some of his coordination and balance issues.
But, Cade, surprising us all, took off and didn't look back. (Of course, we are also teaching him now how to stop and not just fall off - but that's what helmets are for!)
Titus and I are hanging out at the house. Lisa is with him during the day, and I'll take care of him during the night. His cough has improved a lot since last week, but he is still having some heavy secretions. We have a new medication that we started yesterday and will see how that helps.
Please continue to pray for Aidan in Belize. We've been getting reports and seen some pictures and it looks like he is having a great time.
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